Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Woh Ek Kagaz; Jisey Talaq Kehtein Hain !
Thursday, July 7, 2011
My Rain dance!!!

Saturday, June 25, 2011
That's Me !!! Slightly Complicated but Unadulterated !!!

That's me !
Few decades back, all the Gods, cutting across religious lines, very worried over something, assembled themselves in one big corner of the Eden.
Of this lot for all obvious reasons maximum were the Hindu Gods & Deities; more than 33 crores, very much as mentioned in the Hindu Mythology - and increasing daily !
All Gods were terribly upset, angry and somewhat afraid of this lad who though born in a small town, relatively less read-less travelled had somehow learnt the true ways of their great kingdoms. The evil creations of belief, morality, virtue, righteousness etc. formed the kingdoms of the Gods and ensured all humans lived a suppressed life governed by God's hoodlums everywhere.
This lad was telling people about breaking away from the shackles of all these kingdoms and to live a life full of unadulterated, divine & eternal happiness thus available.
People had now started to believe in the lad. Now there were lesser queues outsides churches, temples, mosques and so on. The monetary collections of all religious gangsters were showing decline, worldwide!
Very worried, the Gods exchanged thoughts amongst themselves and unanimously cursed this lad to be on an aimless wanderlust for his lifetime!
To be on the move, no one by him, no one to be called his & no place to be called his own! This was the God's punishment to the lad for trying to displace the Gods from their high & supreme positions!
God's are God's & shall remain so probably ! There word started to work upon the lad’s mortal life. The wanderlust of the lad started! From one place to another, one relationship to other; magic happened - very suddenly his own people stopped recognising him!
The poor lad did not understood for lots of years that it a curse & a conspiracy of the God's to punish him for his effort to give people freedom from a life bound by dead religious customs & verdicts ! The lad was told about this by a fairy; who had fallen from the skies in his arms.
The lad closed his eyes, thought for a moment. The thought of being CURSED was painful. The only way to get his roots for the lad was to uproot the Gods & their collective curse. Mammoth task & insurmountable.
And then he broke into laughters & giggles cuddling the 'Fallen Angel' in his arms !
Since then the battle is on ! Gods as ever are Gods! And the lad is me - Jinesh Bhanu Jain Alias 'Joker Johny'.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Hi!!! The Last One. Somewhat Long & Verbose But a Good Reading!!, I Proactively Seek feedback From Friends- Right From The Heart ( Read On!! Good)
Travelogue 6
Thoughts are playing havoc in my mind!!! Memoirs of this trip, interwoven with the memories and wonderful incidences of my eventful growing up, my earlier travels, people/personalities who have/had graced my life, events/eventualities, incidences & influences, readings/studies etc. are continuously occupying my mind, continuously asking me to sit down and pen it; in a systematic & in a very detailed storytelling manner.
Mrs. Mrinal Pandey, a noted & eminent author of Hindi & a TV Personality, having her origins very much in Garhwal, the very place I am sitting currently at; had described this as an experience of " Labor Pain by a writer/author".
Very different than what happens to politicians after seeing an eager audience & a public addressing system; i.e. a desire to give a speech or even a ”CHAPAAS", an urge to be published, of a novice writer. Not even a fad or eagerness of sharing with someone. Something more of a “SWANTAYAH SUKHAYAH” (for the happiness of oneself), feeling!
The way the work/impression has taken shape in my mind, gives me a reason to believe that it would work out far better and interesting than “ To Hell & Back” – (at the synopsis level for the past three years) & “ Jeevansaathi Dot Dot “ – (again at the synopsis level for the past three years); both looking for the suitable motivation and kicks on my bum to get ahead with them.
But I do not wish to go on with penning anything on this trip now on, transfixed & lured simultaneously by various more interesting activities/options staring at me at this excursion, asking me to get my priorities straight; plenty of skirts to be chased, placid coffees at the German Bakery, loafing around aimlessly for hours and kilometers, my habit of sitting by the Ganges for hours, sitting at the terrace of my hotel and flirting with my beautiful & busty Italian neighbor ‘Sibana’ till dawn, standing in the midst of Laxman Jhoola and feeling as Ganges was flowing just beneath me, as if kissing my feet; looking at the dark Hills of the Himalayas trying to figure out as to, how incomplete would this world be without this unique symmetry of The Holy Ganges & The Himalayas?
Window shopping at all kind of shops, entering my hotel restaurant's kitchen and cooking Indian dishes so good that even the owner is surprised and later gives me opportunity to cook for one actual customer, taking extremely indulgent massages and my customary ritual of a long bath with 45 minutes under hot & cold shower alternatively, all too awesome and satisfying that I want the words playing Rugby in my mind with the ongoing exercise of trying to figure out what would look good, to an ultimate rest. It’s ruining the fun.
Also my forthcoming handing over of my current office at my Corporate Office at Hyderabad soon for which I have already received the tickets ex-A’bad and various checklists, talks with my future employers, me more concerned this time, rather than discussions about role, CTC, responsibilities etc., to requesting them to give me a chair in Ahemdabad. None is looking obliging till now; it seems like Mumbai this time.
Everything put together a pretty messy collage of occupancy of mind & mindset is what I am undergoing; not at all conducive to the process of creation. Though, I have carefully avoided it in my past four mails, my imminent divorce also remains a major demon in my mind, killing all the peace continuously.
A good number of my female friends are regularly poking me and questioning me as to what happened to my travel partner in my journey from Delhi to Dehradun??? What transpired between us??? I will answer this riddle. No stuff that any one of you must have thought!
That beautiful young girl turned out to be a student of Theology with Christianity as her subject of study. In the entire 8-9 hours long journey we kept on discussing religion & spirituality-my favourite subject!! Lots of debates, arguments, agreements/disagreements, facts/myths, viewpoints and sharing knowledge were the very unique part of the journey. In the end proximity for obvious reasons developed which only ended at the end of the journey by blessing her and her very handsome & cute boyfriend Stanley' who had come to receive her for a great life ahead!!! First time in my life maybe I got to actually embrace two grown up person with showering blessings and instructions to the girl’s boyfriend to take good care of her lifelong. Now I have grown old so more of these will follow, the blessings stuff. Princey & Stanley both are in the list of recipients of this mail!!!
Regarding the other story of that Norwegian girl regularly hitting my hotel room, catching me in the Aruna Irani-Rishi Kapoor- Bobby situation twice, as if she knew my unpredictable washing routine; made me later visit her guest house daily. The entire thing in the end turned out to be a great sarcastic saga. I do not have to add too much masala into it to make it an interesting reading. But for the "concerned" readers no national loss of rubber actually happened & no purse was stolen. But whatever happened will keep me in splits for years to come. I plan to keep it here as it is and write the entire story as a standalone thing. Bursts of laughter’s, giggles, and broad grins assured!!!!
The only worth mentioning achievement is my messing up with three of my Ahemdabad female friends, two over alcohol, both late night telephonic accidents.
I permanently lost my old cherished friends; angel faced friend actually worthy to me – this girl kept me glued to her, apart from all the other good reason, by her loveable stupidity. Entering my large bachelors den; probably the most well appointed, well equipped and tidily maintained bachelors dig in entire Ahemdabad; immediately after her arrival starting to point at a self assumed/witnessed untidiness in various spheres of my home. After I got up smiling and with a mop or a duster corrected all these pointed out flaws as a designated Mr.Ramu of my home; only then the meeting proceeded to refreshments or any other further talk.
The second great aspect of this lady has been stunning & shocking me with her investigations about my character, persona and my profession at very regular intervals. In the first couple of days when we had met some months back; rather a long time back, she gave me sufficient and enough reasons to believe that one of my seven female professional contacts were spreading rumours about me on my professional network. Resulting me to blatantly block seven of them from my LinkedIn connection list; permanently severing my relations with them, only to learn later that she got some stupid feedback from a very junior colleague of mine in my past assignment and just to hide his identity she forwarded these seven names picked up by her from my network!!!!
Whatever; I always have died to go out with her, fine dining, movies, small walks and somewhat like her and adore.( Avoiding to use the past tense).
The bloody mistake I committed, getting high; sitting by The Ganges late night, devoted ample of time to tell/convince her that rather than sitting over the possibility of marrying me; explore outside, meet people, get better in life and keep me as a friend!!! I went on going to further vulgar limits of explaining her to look for “ deep pockets” not Adonis’s or good human beings. Further where and how “ deep pockets” could be found and how they are to be obtained & retained in one’s life!!! I had forgotten that my friend herself hailed from an extremely upper class background and behind this my entire monologist conversation with her, my thought process must have been to keep the shackles of marriage away for a long time to come. I also had used lots of foul language trying to emphasize upon my points in my Punjabi Hindi; which I switchover to whenever I want to.
Next morning, my cell was full of sms’s from her, cursing me for my outlook to life and yes the foul language used by me. She bid me goodbye for ever; and I know, as I know her and the entire gamut of relationships a bit; this was final & ultimate.
Over the years I have become kind of inert to breaking bondings; but this time the pain has been near myocardial, and is being felt by me every moment.
I will keep on waiting on all weekends and Sunday afternoons for that crazy call “ hey listen, I am hungry as hell; going to Pride for lunch, join me in 20 minutes”; perplexed me arguing “ not even bathed yet and Pride is itself 30 minutes drive from my place-you nuts”. The stubborn reply coming “that’s your headache, ensure you are shaven; suitably dressed and please ensure that you eat with proper etiquettes, not needing a ‘bib’ for yourself”. Further- “bring a 50 rupees note for the tips”.
I do not know why I do this to me & my people. I had last tasted alcohol in 2004, did lots of screw ups till then. This year already 4 times and this is the damage!!!! Now nobody needs to guess which side of the road where a wine shop or a bar is I am going to walk, now on!!!!!!!
The second loss was a new entrant in my life. A beautiful, soft spoken, Punjabi Khatri girl. This special ‘Punjabi Khatri’ emphasis has a deep rooted meaning. My Management Institute flooded from crowd from Delhi, Chandigarh & Punjab had ample of beautiful, intelligent girls, lots being Punjabi Khatri’s. Several were my friends, some I have reasons to believe found my company good and an entire other set was liked by me but they never were too enthusiastic about me.
My first serious affair was also with a very distinguished, beautiful Punjabi Khatri girl. Probably the only person I confided in regarding everything, 1993 thru 1996. The breakup of the same happened because of intervention of my parents due to this “ Jain” factor; had an ever enduring impact on my all spheres of life; till date. Had it not been my benevolent colleagues at Kolkata & Orissa who in that obsessed phase of mine helped me to come out of it and get back to work; I think I would have travelled back to Indore and killed my own father!!!! Not kiddin!
Though coming out of it, living in hotels for months on strech, all alone, no one to talk to, in various parts of Orissa for months & months; working on projects, took quite some time. Some of those colleagues who got over a working relationship and much further above the extremely politicized environment we worked in, are in the recipient list of this mail, I will always remain indebted to you particularly, Swarnendu & a very kind Bhabiji.
Anyways, this lady apparently got pretty confused after reading these notes of mine and as to what my true persona was and what values, morals, career/life objectives concerned me? I had given her ample fuel by talking foolishly to her in the very initial stages of a relationship, in a drunk Ganges Bank moment at a late night, about my schedule and priorities at Hrishikesh, consisting of chasing skirts, getting drunk, mentioning of my drooling around in the Shamshan Ghat at 1’O clock in the morning, near Ganges; with a funeral pier still lighted up for good!!!!! Several other stuff that’s always ready with me to scare some ladies; on a lookout for a sedate/homely/traditional relationship.
She escaped leaving a decent goodbye sms next morning.
Baby, I am a worked up executive & a screwed up individual, just following my heart over a vacation.
The third one; more forgiving because of her Landmark Training, later accommodated me but with lots of lectures. Landmark works; but not taking chances, I want to add more inventory in my coffers so that I do not get out of stock in the near future. Any takers!!!!!!!! Drop in a mail, Ahemdabad only; not kidding.
Anyways I leave it here with the pictures to be shared; the writing part left for the future; or may be for never!!!!
Chow!!!!!!
Regards,
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Travel Diary 5 : Hrishikesh 1 - A paradise away from heaven! A wonderful escape!!! A place to stop by for days (Practicing the Art of Doing Nothing!!!
How wrong totally !!!!
In my five hours long, mouth agape visit to Hrishikesh, I was convinced that I should drop anchor here for some days and do nothing!!!! Clear, free flowing Ganges, much better than Haridwar, Himalayas in the backdrop, lots of Yoga & Meditation classes, Language Classes, Massage Centres, Coffee Shops and most importantly various Sports and Activities like Rafting, Trekking, Camping, Safari etc. would entice anybody on his holidays!
I had read on Google, that Hrishikesh got prominence after Beatles visited Hrishikesh in 1964 to meet their Yoga & Spritual Guru Mahirshi Mahesh Yogi.
Mahirshi Yogi was the Guru to several celebrities in Hollywood & West including Michael Jackson. Mahirshi Mahesh Yogi incidentally hails from the place where my roots are i.e. Jabalpur, and together with him the origin of OSHO, the famed hindi satirist - Hari Shankar Parsai to Bollywood's Sharat Saxena & also our own Sambha- Mac Mohan; from Jabalpur, is dropped in by me during conversations in trains etc to get leverage for my stature there, that point in time.
Anyways since the visit of Beatles, the foreigners started flocking Hrishikesh; and that remains the case till date.
Hrishikesh has two ends prominently; the Ram Jhoola & the Laxmam Jhoola. The walk over both is fabulous; giving different meaning to Ganges at different times in Morning, Afternoon, Evening & Night. Especially at the late night, when the entire town is sleeping, standing in the midst of either of these Jhoolas, feeling the mild breeze hitting your chest, inhaling it and looking down at the Ganges flowing down the Jhoola; Ganges flowing down with slight beautiful noise t tickling your ear is one unique experience. I took it thrice; once dead drunk (loosing a female friend over this) and twice sane. Wonderful!!!!
On both sides of the river are hotels, lodges, dharmashalas costing various rates. I chose to go for luxury this time and going by the Travel Book " The Lonely Planet " booked Hotel Ishaan at Laxman Jhoola with ample of river view from the room, the balcony, the two terraces above my room and two beautiful Restaurants in the Hotel itself!!! The rooms were well appointed with nearly all 3 star facilities at a throw away price!!! Off season!! I paid the hotel ample of advance so that I got committed to stay there long. Now I did not wanted to go to Yamunotri & Gangotri immediately. I just wanted to be here - Doing Nothing!!!!
The accounts of Hrishikesh could go very long. As such these are just jottings I am making.
The most notable experience of my stay remains a Norwegian very beautiful, seductive gal entering my room, without alarm and catching me in all my Michaelangloishness; me fresh out of the bathroom, after a wash; the girl claiming that she was there just to admire the room. She kept on coming; we agreed to leave for Dharmashala and stay there for some days but something happened! Thats very hilarious. Some other time.
Work is calling!!! Let me see how long can I defy it!!!!!
Regards,
Friday, January 7, 2011
Haridwar - 2 Never come here to stay as a tourist!!!!!
This is the only advise by me to any of you who decides to undertake travel to this side of the country; never take a big stopover at Haridwar. It is not worth it.
Haridwar has his owns religuos importance to the Hindus, that is unquestioned. But even for somebody who wants to be here for religious reasons, apart from The Evening Aarti of Ganges, some temples at the very same, Har Ki Paudi where the aarti is held and some temples at slight distance, nothing actually is there.
I had gone looking for some signs of the gone era where the wealthy Bengali Jamindaars, ladies from their families, other people who could afford it to come and stay here in the PASHCHIM ( PACHAYIN or WEST) [Haridwar is to the west of undivided/divided Bengal} primarily for religious, rest, peace & health reasons. Nearly all great Bengali novelist have mentioned this phenomenon in their celebrated works be it be Saratchandra, Rabindranath Tagore etc. After Varanasi, Haridwar was one place for ostracized widows to spend their balance of life in huge misery.
The signs of that era are gone, though the old big mansions like Dharmashalas etc remain. Several akhadas, dharmashalas for all religion, jaati people.
All commercialized. Rather heavily commercialized. From the mid of the town walking to the 3 kms or less stretch of road is walking on a wide road with all kind of shops on the both sides. Religious stuff like Rudraksha, gems, clothes, eateries everything. Autorickshaws trying to run you over, cycle rickshaws trying to climb over you, all.
The only find of me was to get to speak to a Haridwar Panda and try and get his trade secret. If anybody aware that his family was doing the Shraadha rites for the families ancestors at Haridwar, but was not aware about the name of the Panda doing it, he just had to announce himself at the Ghats of Har Ki Paudi. The Pandas going by his Jati, Surname, Town & Mohalla will dig it out in some minutes. His entire ancestral details are with them. The panda telling me regarding this phenomenon excitedly told me several time that they were faster than a computer.
I too in a very vocal & animated tone explained him the importance and feasibility of going for an ERP package like SAP R/3, BAAN or Peoplesoft for the purpose of linking all vultures practicing as Pandas at Haridwar, Varanasi or Gaya in the collective business of screwing gullible public with a very evident advantage that if by mistake a prospective customer of Haridwar landed up at Gaya or Varanasi; could be directed to suitable location of slaughter. Plus this way a perfect account management would be possible. Direct mailers etc etc. Looking at the perplexed face of those two pandas, I moved on.
The better place to camp, stay and enjoy is Hrshikesh. Hrishikesh pictures in next mail.